Eating out review of the new look Croft Hotel, near Darlington

“It’s been ripped out, knocked through, run down, tarted up. It’s featured overlarge chairs and supersize wooden lions. It’s been rustic, it’s been modern, it’s been Mediterranean...”

Since 2013, the hotel has run through more owners and revamps and it has burned through eye-watering sums of money, if local gossip is to be believed.

In February there came another new owner, The Apartment Group, of Newcastle, which owns 15 other properties in the North East, including Whitworth Hall at Spennymoor plus Lartington Hall and Runa Farm (formerly the Jersey Farm) both near Barnard Castle.

The new look Croft Hotel with bare bricks on the stable block

This summer, there’s been another revamp at the Croft. Most noticeably, its stable block has been sandblasted to reveal its 200-year-old brickwork, and, inside one of the worst aspects of the previous revamp has been removed: the restaurant had high-backed bench-seats that were topped with rugs hair long enough to have come from an Afghan Hound. As you sat on the bench with the Afghan’s hair fluffing around your shoulders, you prayed that the previous occupant had good hygiene standards.

Perhaps I am just nit-picking with that complaint: there was a revamp about 20 years ago that created a Dungeons and Dragons themed male toilet in which the urinals were open-mouthed monsters with sharp teeth ringing the area where you were supposed to point a sensitive part of your anatomy. Going to the toilet was a uniquely discomforting experience.

Now the Croft is stylishly aiming at the wedding market with its Georgian front door transformed into a tasteful Instagram setting.

Our reviewer tries out the Instagrammable front door and offers a tip to brides-to-be: don't wear pink against a pink door

There was a wedding in full flow on the night we dined but, other than the sight of the bride drifting through the car park in a flowing gown, it had no impact on us in the dining room.

The menu is a curious mix of Asian influences with several European countries represented alongside a few British pub classics. There was no fish main course, a part from scampi, but several dishes were vegetarian, including an interesting-sounding Summer Pea & Shallot Ravioli (£16.50).

Six of us were dining and we started by sharing three nice appetisers. The Pea & Ham Terrine (£7.50) had plenty of accompanying tastes of mustard mayo, cider chutney and picked vegetables, and went down well. The Vegetable Gyoza (£7.50) (below) – a Japanese dumpling – were crispy on the outside and packed with smooth vegetables inside. A good Sticky Korean Jam prevented them from becoming bland.

And the Crispy Halloumi (£7.95) (above) was more soggy than crunchy, but certainly it was squeaky and very pleasant with the slightly spicy mayonnaise.

The gyoza and halloumi came, as the menu promised, sprinkled with slices of fresh red chilli, seeds spilling out all over. Many in our party found the chilli much too hot for comfort and had to clean it off before enjoying the starters.

For our mains, we had two very acceptable burgers (£16.95) – one beef (above), one chicken – which were accompanied by good homemade relish and some fantastic chips: golden and crispy with a fluffy interior.

We had a Pie of the Day (£16.95) (above), which was steak. It was a little kizzened on its lid, but it was a proper pie – none of this puff pastry nonsense – and packed with meat, it sat nicely on a bed of mushy peas. It came with a good gravy and a portion of those chips.

Petra, my wife, had Crunchy Thai Noodle Salad which could have come plain or topped with panko chicken, glazed tofu or chilli beef. She opted for plain beef (£16.50) (above) and found herself rather overwhelmed by the crunchiness of the Asian slaw, the leaves and the peanuts.

I went for the Chicken Milanese (£16.50) (above) which, days later, I am still trying to comprehend. Milanese suggests Italian breadcrumbed fillets fried and served with a touch of lemon. These, though, had Japanese panko crumb and they came with a whopping charred lemon.

The fillets were nicely juicy but they sat on a very small bed of roquette and tomato which had been liberally doused with Balsamic dressing.

So there were two extremely sharp tastes – the vinegar competing with the lemon which had become more lemony through charring. They were calmed a little by the garlic aioli, but there wasn’t enough salad to see the dish through to the end, so I was left with a bit of chicken fillet and a massive piece of charred lemon.

How it was crying out for a couple of the chips that everybody else was enthusing about.

All desserts were £6.95, a part from Petra’s cheeseboard which was £9.95. The lemon tart (above) came with a sharp red berry compote and a scoop of sweet strawberry ice cream so the flavours of the fruit got drowned out by the battle between sharp and sweet.

Our son Theo, though, loved his Biscoff Cheesecake which came with a very generous smear of sticky Biscoff sauce, and I thought my Salted Caramel & Chocolate Tart (above) was extremely good – even through the popcorn ice cream and the chocolate sauce, I still got a hint of salted caramel.

Cheeseboards are a dying art these days, but this (above) was a fair attempt: four cheeses (Brie, goat’s, blue and cheddar) at room temperature in large enough quantities for pieces to be wrapped up and taken home.

Our bill came to £31.50-a-head with drinks whereas 10 years ago, when the main courses were £14.50, it was about £27.50 each.

The village of Croft needs this historic hotel at its heart to thrive, and by tidying up the outside, it has become an elegant, Instagrammable wedding venue – it only needs a few tidyings up inside to create a new buzz about the hot dinners in the restaurant as well.

THE DETAILS

The Croft Hotel,
Croft-on-Tees, Darlington DL2 2ST

Website: croft-hotel.com
Phone: 01325-720319

THE RATINGS (OUT OF 10)

Surroundings: 7
Service: 7
Food quality: 7
Value for money: 7